stay away from my life!!!!!

why me??

what the h_ _ _ going on??
wht's wrong with me..??
why u drive me to feel this kind of scared..??
if only u know..
know that how scared i am...
scared to sleep...
n sumtimes i even scared to closed my eyes..
even just for a while..
it's not becoz i'm pretending to be hypocrite here..
coz i love to sleep..
but u make me scared..
scared to close my eyes..
coz everytime i wake up or i open my eyes,
i just know that u r no longer by my side..
that make me feels soo scared..
did u ever know that..??
why u keep doing all that towards me..??
what is my fault..??
why u keep come n go..??
did i make any mistake...
n even if i do,
did the mistake deserved all that punishment..??
did u do that on purpose..??
or u just don't realize that u r punishing me rite now..??
u know me rite..
u know me..very well..
i'm sure of it..
but why u pretend as if u don't know anything about me..??
why??
can u explain??
do u know that its really hard for me to face n go through all these..??
did u realize..??
or is it just a test..??
no..i don't think so..
i know u mean it...u really do...i'm sure..
but pleaze..make an end to it..
coz i just can't bear to face it anymore..
pleaze..:'-(

i hate u!!
even millions of time i've said that phrase,
but do i really hate u??
i'm sure u got the answer..
the onl thing that keep playing in my mind for now is when r u going to go away..??
i mean, forever...
i know n realize that u r not ok to see me "like this"...
the behaviour of mine..
which make u sick day by day..
but i just can't stop from being like this as long as u not dissappear forever from my life..
u might see me smile..
"pretending" to be happy..
but deep in side my heart..
do u ever know how suffer i am..
how misery life i've been through all this while..??
did u ever know that..??
did u..??
so..
please stay away from my life..
i really wish that i could have somebody to tell u all this..
somebody who can make u stop all this..
u got someone care for u rite..
so please stop make it hard for me..
will u..??